Why Janelle Monae? Is it her magnificent tits that she’s very open to sharing with the world? Is it her irresistibly cute face? Nah. It’s that one Grimes video from a decade ago. Venus Fly. That’s where I saw her first. A bit embarrassing, I know, since she’d been making music for years before, but we all discover artists somehow, right? I’m glad I did. I got into her solo career after that. It’s awesome. Then, I found out she did movies. The first one I saw was Glass Onion. She was amazing in it. She also did Hidden Figures, way back in 2016, but I still haven’t seen it because I don’t give too many shits about math or science, but apparently it was super important. Three black women doing math for NASA rockets. Good shit. I appreciate the milestones. I have it on good authority that Janelle was amazing in that movie. Hell, everyone agrees she’s amazing at everything she does.
She’s worked with Grimes, she’s worked with Erykah Badu, she was amazing with Daniel Craig and she’s done music with the dude from Outkast. No, not Andre, the other one. Sorry, Big Boi. Do more for brand recognition, my man. I love this chick’s music; I love her movie performances and I absolutely adore her as a person. This is the kind of babe I’d love to go out with, genuinely, not to fast track to the sex, but to really ramp up the pressure before the inevitable perfect lay. She has a song called queen. Check it out. It very succinctly summarizes how I feel about Janelle Monae. She’s a queen. If I could, I’d date her until my heart falls out of my chest. It’s not on the table right now, so I’m going to just fap to her tits. I’m not trying to be disrespectful. I’m just proud to be a pig.
The Body of a Queen
I have to get some awkward shit out of the way before we start stripping Janelle Monae for nasties – she is a hot and talented African American lady and because she’s a fucking genius, a lot of her creative work centers on race equality and the like. That falls under politics. I don’t like politics. I’m not disagreeing, no. I mean, I can’t care about that – I have a job to do. I see all people equally, as far as race is concerned. So, great props to Janelle for fighting her good fight, but this article is more about the person, not the politics. So, there’s my acknowledgment of that, now let’s get past it. You want more politics, go read a blog that isn’t exclusively about tits and ass.
Janelle has tits, Janelle has an ass. Both are glorious. I was surprised. The first few times I saw her she was wearing very topical outfits. For the music videos, you know. Not sexy, but mystical. I wasn’t really able to see much and I didn’t notice. I didn’t know she had glorious tits because her videos weren’t about her tits. But, she’s proud of her tits, so there’s plenty of them out there. I like this kind of segmentation. Music for music’s sake. Tits for tats. I mean tits for me. Tits for my boner. Janelle Monae’s glorious milkers for an uncountable number of glorious boners. I’m down. This chick’s shaped like a dream and that dream is coming true. I mean, just look her up. She’s gorgeous. She’s been topless on magazine covers, for fuck’s sakes.
Lipstick Lover
It’s a song. Not one of my favorites. I prefer her other shit. But, in terms of music videos? Well, it’s her, naked, being very wet with a lot of other naked women. That’s all. That’s all there is to it. She’s amazing and naked, for the sake of being proud of her form, I guess. I very much appreciate people who love showing off their looks and they’re not coy about it. Janelle wasn’t in Glass Onion for you to fap to her, but this shit? Yeah, she knows you’re hard. Don’t try to dissuade me. When a chick is this proud of her mommy milkers and she wants to share them with the world, for free, on YouTube of all places, yeah. She wants you to fap. Or, at the very least, it’s warmly encouraged. The song’s a bop too, if you’re into that. Bottom line, she’s given us a lot of flesh. A lot of quality flesh. She’s smart, beautiful and interesting. What a complete package, am I right?
Faps or Worship?
It’s kind of a given that I review shit for the faps. Whether it’s women I wanna bang, or dudes you might enjoy sucking on, I am fighting the good fight, for sucks and fucks. I am a cum enthusiast. I encourage the cum, from everyone. That puts me in an awkward spot with Ms. Monae because she’s such a fucking multi-talent. She’s done a little bit of everything. To say that all she’s good for is bending over would be more than just insulting, it would be a criminal lie. She’s amazing at everything she does. So how do I fap to her? Well, proudly, I suppose. She’s amazing. I love her music and I love her body. Which is better? I don’t compare. They’re separate categories. At a certain point, these chicks I review, that you worship, they become idols. Like the babes you used to have posters of across the walls of your room in high school.
Yeah, we find her irresistible, but we didn’t put her up there just because she’s hot. We might have, but I doubt that’s all there is to it when you make your choice. Sure, I was in love with Nelly Furtado 20 years ago, but it wasn’t just because she was a hot piece of ass. Yes, her ass was majestic and for a while it was my favorite ass to look at. That’s why she hung over my bed. But there was more to it than that. I liked her as a person, or as much as I knew of her from her music. Same shit applies here. I want to bang Janelle Monae until my dick falls off, but she’s good for so much more than that. Hell, she could sing me a song in-between fucks. I’d clap every time. If she wants to use me as a footstool and have me call her majesty, I’d be down for that too. Some chicks are dommy even when they’re not trying to be. Maybe it’s just my natural submission pouring out.
The Future
I don’t need to check, I know in my soul, she’s doing good. There will be new albums, new movies and hopefully more naked breast. We still haven’t seen her pussy, at least, not properly. That could be a good bonus. A nice mid-ground proposal – a movie about lesbian orgies starring Janelle Monae. It can double as feminist commentary with serious scenes, but as long as it has her and a bunch of other wet pussies, it’ll be worth the watch for the whole damn family.
Women like Janelle Monae make the world go around. I love the fact that she’s so uninhibited in her work. When she has a statement to make, she fucking makes it. She never holds back. A lot of her music has this whole “I don’t give a fuck if you don’t like me” vibe to it and I live for that shit. People give way too many fucks about what other people think about them. Legends like Janelle Monae put us back on track. So what if I’m a horny pig of a man? I’ve never hurt anyone. I spend most of my time playing with myself. I’m not about to feel bad about myself because you don’t like my lifestyle. I’m going to keep rubbing. It is my God given right.
