Most people think that all porn stars are dumbasses, but that's not the case. There are many stars out there that are as bright as they are sexy. Perhaps it's not the norm, but porn stars don't deserve the stigma they receive.
Eiffled Einsteins
I'm not saying there are Einsteins out there getting Eiffle Towered by a gaggle of midgets dressed like ninjas and cowboys. I'm just saying a bitch might have something clever to say every now and again.
One such bitch is Siri Dahl. Siri was born in Minneapolis, Minnesota, on June 20th, 1988. During her youth, she worked as a cashier at a local grocery store. Eventually, she entered college to study communication and foreign languages.
However, communication and foreign languages didn't stick. She needed something more exciting in her life, and what's more exciting than the adult entertainment industry? Siri agreed and filmed her first scene at the age of twenty-four.
She starred alongside longtime stunt cock, Voodoo, who I'm sure made her first experience a good one. The video was produced by Reality Kings and received a warm welcome.
A year later, in 2013, Siri began filming BDSM-themed content for Fem Dom Empire. Her costar and director were none other than the sexy and skilled Lexi Sindel. Only a few months later, she was nominated for her first Adult Video News award for best new actress.
It took a couple more years before Siri shot her first anal scene. She must have been a bit shy about getting her asshole turned into a cum dumpster. I can't imagine why. Just lube up, stretch out, and don't start with a big black dick. Instead, find some little Asian dude to take your anal virginity.
The scene was in the film "Stacked 2," and I highly recommend giving it a watch. After popping her anal virginity, it was time for an interracial scene with Amy Anderssen in "Lex's Breast Festival 3."
In 2015 Siri got the most award nominations of her career, with a total of five, including best-supporting actress for "Sweetness and Light," best HMH trio scene for "From Both Ends," best actress in a couple-themed movie for "These Things We Do," and best sex scene for "Rekindling the Flame."
In 2017 she retired from the adult entertainment industry to focus on other projects. However, retirement didn't last long for Siri, and she was back doing what she does best only three years later.
To date, she has starred or costarred in over three hundred and thirty productions filmed with some of the best studios in the industry, including Lethal Hardcore, Evil Angel, Girlfriends Films, Reality Kings, New Sensations, Score, Hard X, Bang Productions, Eros Arts, Brazzers, and Devil's Film.
Siri is one of the few porn stars to actually make her way out of porn to shoot ordinary movies. For example, she acts in the hilarious comedy "Ooga Booga" from 2013.
Chaotic Good
Let's dive into Siri's Twitter and see what she gets up to. She describes herself as an Alt Star award winner FPOTY and as chaotic good. Plus, she links her Only Fans and Snip Feed.
Despite having only joined Twitter in June of 2019, Siri has already racked up nearly three hundred thousand followers. That's some rapid growth. There are porn stars out there that would kill for that kind of growth.
Sexual Socialism
Siri's current pinned tweet has endeared her to me for life. She will forever be one of my favorite porn stars after posting a pic of herself all oiled up in a bikini with the caption, "There is no ethical consumption under capitalism except for my oiled up ass and titties." I didn't know pussy and socialism formed such a potent combo on my penis.
I'm always encouraging pussies to be socialists. Don't keep that tight twat to yourself. Please share it with the world. In exchange, you can have all the penis you can handle. Feel free to hop on without asking any time of day or night.
The next post down is a screenshot of Siri's Tumblr from back in 2013. A fan asked if she felt any responsibility for how porn affects what people think of as normal human sexuality.
Of course, Siri's response is on point. She does feel responsible and wishes porn came with a disclaimer that this is fantasy. To help combat that messaging, she only shoots scenes doing things she would actually do in her personal life. That is admirable as I imagine it's lost her money in the past.
It also means that when we watch Siri's porn, we get a personal look into how she actually fucks. Limiting herself to only what she would do privately doesn't actually restrict her much. This bitch is down to clown.
If you're reading this article soon after its release, you should sprint to Siris Only Fans because it's probably still on sale. If you want to see Siri naked for cheap, act fast.
Speaking of seeing Siri naked, it's quite a sight to behold. She is built like a statue. Her curves are deep, and her musculature is strong. She would have no problem fucking you all night. You're tapping out before this bitch does.
Cumblr
Siri is one of the few porn stars who regularly plug their Tumblr. It's appropriately titled the Dahl House, and she covers all sorts of topics, including sex and porn. You guys are porn fanatics like myself, so I bet you'll find it interesting. That is if you can read. I think some of you stare at the words in my articles long enough to appear to have read them before just clicking on the links and wanking.
While you're busy checking out Siri's Tumblr, don't forget about her fan club. Let Siri know how much you love her by becoming a member. It gives you access to exclusive content that will have your cock firing off nuts like an anti-aircraft gun.
The more time I spend on Siri's Twitter, the more I like her. I love this post containing a sexy artistic picture of her with the caption, "Weed and chill? Weed and chill." There's nothing like a little puff and fuck. It's way better than Hufflepuff.
Siri is a bad bitch. I would recommend repeating the action of a drunk fellow who recently approached her on the street and tried to grab her. Siri immediately threw him off and kicked him, at which point the guy scurried away with his friends.
Unfortunately, I wouldn't be surprised if that was one of my readers. You guys are so desperate, clueless, and semi retarded, that you might think it would work. At least if you're drunk. So let this be a lesson: if talking to a bitch doesn't work, grabbing her won't either.
Ahhhh. It's no wonder Siri has been advertising her Tumblr so much. They recently announced that they're allowing nudity again, pending it isn't explicit. I suppose that means you can show your ass, but you can't show your ass being penetrated by three fat black cocks. Tits and ass is a start, but we have to get back to penetration soon.
I love Siri's lesbian content. She knows exactly what men want to see when two bitches are fucking. She also chooses partners wisely. Siri only fucks the sexiest lesbians. Bitches like Spencer Bradley.
For Halloween, Siri dressed as both a devil and an angel. I'll fuck either form of her. If it were possible, I'd fuck both versions at the same time. Do we have the technology?
Meditative Masturbation
Listen. We can't all be perfect, and even Siri has her faults. "I'm literally a white lady who cleanses her Tarot deck with a ritualistic knife made of selenite." Alright. So Siri is a crystal bitch. I can look over that fact, given her many positive attributes.
I wonder if she has any crystal dildos? Is that a thing? Could Siri cleanse her pussy with a quartz strap-on dipped in sage ash? Is she one lapis lazuli anal bead away from achieving nirvana?
I'm no astrologist, but I want to be in that ass. I'm whatever sign you need me to be, baby. Let me rub some patchouli lube on my dick and cram it inside your lotus flower.
Siri is one of my favorite porn stars not only because of her beauty but because she is clever and funny also. Believe it or not, not every porn star is good at fucking in private. Something tells me that's not the case with Siri. I think she is a dick champion.
My only complaint about Siri's Twitter page is that it doesn't contain enough explicit nudes. There are plenty of sexy pics and clips, but few are clear views of her fully naked body.
You motherfuckers will have a blast wandering around this bitches Twitter, so get started right away.
