- Extremely fuckable body
- Hot sex with women
- Big breasts
- Weird nipples
- Too much makeup
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Naty Delgado
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Naty Delgado "leaked" OnlyFans porn & nudes? Nope. Okay girls, listen up. I speak for all men here. Fuck it, I’ll speak for the bisexuals and lesbians as well. A lot of makeup on your face is not it. It doesn’t look hot. If you’re ugly, go to a clinic or something. Go all Jeffery Dahmer and skin some faces. You can slap it on your own. For legal reasons, I don't endorse face stealing. There are other ways to amp up your hotness scale. Like, smiling. Or having a cock in your mouth. Especially having my cock in your mouth. This ol’ wiener will make anything and anyone look pretty next to it. Naty, just come and let me frame your face with my cock. This chick is makeup personified. If you’re not very careful, your possessions will possess you. A little Marina quote for you. Hot chick. Would smash. Point is, Naty has let her makeup possess her. It’s something of an obsession. I’ve been with a kajillion of girls, so I know what I’m talking about.
This chick doiesn't go to the store without makeup. She’d go in fucking Crocs and PJs, but oh no. Not without the cat eyes and the other thingamajigs. Whatever they’re called, that’s too much man. The eyebrows. They’re made to catch sweat from going into your eyes. And collect all the cummies heading for your eyes. Cum in the eye hurts you know. I don’t have first-hand experience. But I’ve blown many loads on chicks' faces, I know what’s up. Why am I even telling you random facts about eyebrows? I was reading a biology book today, okay? Let a man tell you some fun facts. Jesus. All you want to know is porn this, porn that. Naty’s eyebrows are being abused. They need help. They’re SOSing. She’s drawn over them so much that they look like logs of poop. There’s a subreddit for this exact thing. Shit, that looks like shit, but isn’t shit. It’s called r/poopfromabutt. Look it up.
Milkers City
Holy fucking mother of boob. Those things are the size of watermelons that are the size of the sun. The million-dollar question is, Naty, are those natty? Fucking yes. How the fuck are those natural. It just can’t be. But it is. What reality am I living in? Have I accidentally shifted to another universe? Somewhere where women have big boobas exclusively? Jesus H Christ and the son of all that is holy. I am impressed and a half. The only other time I was this impressed by breasts was when I saw this Asian chick. I can’t for the life of me remember her name. Please, oh please, if you know who I’m talking about, email me. She’s super thin and has huge, lickable, suckable, squeezable, and milkable breasts. It’s uncanny. Naty doesn’t rival her, but she’s close. I was convinced that they were fake. I wasn’t even gonna check. Some people make sites with facts about pornstars. So, the proof is in the pudding. It says it right there, real/natural.Unfortunate things have happened. Naty is like that movie, “A series of unfortunate events”. First the makeup, now the nipples. I was so excited about her boobies. They look awesome in clothing. Keep them in clothing. When doing porn, cover them with tape. You can make it sexy; I promise. The nipples look like something that came fresh out of Chernobyl. I have never, ever, seen anything like it. They’re huge. They’re misshapen. They’re the color of muddy puddles. Or freshly relieved excrement. That color of nipple works, doesn't really work, ever. At least it’s not her fault. Hey, she shouldn’t be ashamed of having them. Her nipples, her life. But I’m the one who has to look at them. And I refuse to look at them for longer than I have to.
Body Crafted By AI
That’s the only fucking way I can consider her body being real. But the truth is, that’s her fucking body. How are the proportions this good? How is the ass so fat? How is her waist so small? A thousand questions and no answers. She must hit the gym 69 times a day. She doesn’t just hit it. She beats it with a wooden spoon. The gym is afraid of her. It’s plain and simple. She’s one fuckable piece of ass. I just ate some pasta, so my stomach is full. My cock is also full. Full of cum for Naty. This chick simply must bounce on my cock. It’s written in the stars. And if it’s not, I’ll fucking fix it. I will go to fucking space and move the stars. They will align and we will fuck. Jesus, I wasn’t expecting to get this hot and bothered over Naty. She’s polluting my brain with chemicals of horny. The blood has left 99% of my body and it’s been rerouted to my cock.I can get over the heavy makeup. There, I’m over it. Plus, when I’m doing her, there won’t be much makeup left. Her thighs are thiccie ones. This is not a problem in the slightest. All thighs are good thighs. Except for the ones you see on TLC. You know, The Learning Channel? That channel is a Wild West at this point. It has so much garbage I can smell it through the screen. There’s this show for people that are over 600 pounds. Yeah, those thighs, I do not find fuckable. But also, color me curious. I sometimes find it unfair how I don’t have fetishes other people do. Like the feeder fetish. People who are into really fat chicks. Am I the only one who doesn’t have the fetish but is curious? These are the things I think about. What it would be like to fuck a woman the size of a fridge.
I don’t know if I’ll be able to get it up. Just thinking about it killed my boner. Which I’m actually happy about. Naty drove me too fucking insane with her yummyliciousness. I could have ended up in a facility with rooms filled with fluffy white pillows. I’m afraid now. I haven’t even gotten to her porn yet. All I’ve seen was her Instagram. And this is what happened. Wish me luck soldiers. I hope to come out of this with a healthy, functioning cerebral cortex. If I don’t, all my cash is going to Naty. So she can fix her nipples. And pay a high-end doctor to fix my brain so I can fuck hers out.
Hot, hot, hot
First of all, she’s bi. Do you know what that means? Mason, the fucking numbers. She fucks chicks. Now I’m supposed to decide what I like more. Her with pussy or her with cock. Simply impossible. Difficulty level nightmare. Video games haven’t yet invented this level of difficulty. But porn has. I can only watch one video at a time. I can only ejaculate once every 3.5 minutes. Yes, I do have that superpower. No, I haven’t trained myself. Yes, I’m seamenally gifted. Here’s the compromise. I have multiple screens, right? I have a genius idea. Shhh. Listen closely. Come. Porn on every screen. I know, revolutionary.But here’s the problem with that. I only have two eyes. Is there like, a way to split them? Maybe I can punch myself in the head real hard. Tell me something. Do people with one lazy eye have the luxury of watching two screens at the same time? I simply must know. Comment your answers down below. Don’t forget to like and subscribe. For now, I remain with this miserable existence. Go ahead. Call me a drama queen. You will be one too when you check out Naty.
I am Confusion
I thought Naty had huge hoohas. Upon further expectation, it seems like they deflated. Was this all a lie? Looks like I freaked out for no reason. I word-vomited all over the page because of how crazy her boobies made me. And now, they’re normal-looking. Except for the nipples. I still can’t get over the nipples. In this video I’m watching, they’re like, C cups. And before, she had DDDDDD cups. I was asking myself if I accidentally teleported into a world with only huge boobs. Maybe now I’m back to my original reality. I’ve been watching too much Rick and Morty… I guess even like this, her breasts are acceptable. Doesn’t change the fact that I’m super confused. Where did they go? Did they walk off? Maybe they were shy because of the way the nipples look and walked away. But the nipples are still there. So that theory is debunked.Pregnant porn. Awesome segway. I can’t just not talk about it. When I saw it, I forgot all about the boobie debacle. What in tarnation is this? She’s got videos of her fucking pregnant chicks. There’s an actual human in there. What are these people thinking? Ah, fuck, of course. It’s the fucking fetish shit again. Another one I’m not a part of. Come on, let me in, LET ME IN. … Let me in, I'm tryna fuck. If you get that reference, you a king.